Going Back In Time

I was brought into this world on September 1st 1983. I was born to unwed parents. My parents didn't stay together much longer after I was born. I lived my mother and grandparents. I seen my father (Larry) off and on. When I was about 5yrs old my mother (Sharon) married a man named Tom. We moved in with Tom. I called Tom dad since my biological father was never really around. Tom was more a father to me than mo so-called father was. My mother and Tom gave me 2 brothers and a sister. My life was good. I started going over to my biological fathers more often. My father been in a relationship with a lady named Cheryl and they gave me a sister. So by the time I was about 13 I had 2 brothers and 2 sisters. They were only my half brothers and sisters, but I never looked at it that way. My sister that was brought into this world by my father (Larry) and Cheryl I didn't have a close relationship with. We didn't see each other often. For some reason I decided that I really didn't want to spend time with my father (Larry) so I never go to bond with my sister. As for my brothers and sister brought into this world by my mother (Sharon) and Tom I had a wonderful relationship with. My family was my mother, Tom my brothers Justin and Cody and my sister Megan. My mother has 2 sisters Sheila and Sandy and 2 brothers Mark and Mike. My mothers parents Bobby and Margaret were always around to help and do things with their grand kids. I love them dearly!! Tom was adoptive when he was a baby by a wonderful woman named June. I considered her my grandma. We spent a lot of time with her. My father (Larry) had a wonderful mother named Viola :) I ♥ her sooo much. As for his father. He wasn't around much. I don't know much about him, I can't even think of his name right now. My father (Larry) has 8 brothers and sisters. Many of them live in different states so I never really got to see them, except his sisters Nancy and Debbie.

My life was good. I had a loving and caring family that made sure I had food, clothes, a roof over my head and made sure I was healthy. I couldn't of asked for more.

Then something changed when I was around 14yrs old. Something that changed my life and my family's life forever. My mother started working for my Uncle Mark's wife at a bar. I could tell something was different about my mother, but I wasn't sure what it was. I started to notice that she wasn't around like she use to be. I could also tell that there was something wrong with Tom. I never really asked what was going on. I was in my Freshman year of H.S. and when I came home from school my grandfather was watching my brothers and sister. My grandfather would leave and I would have to take care of my brothers and sisters, make dinner, so that it was ready when Tom got home from work. At the time my brothers were 8 and 5 my sister was 2. I use to think to myself, where's my mom and why am I the one having to do all this. I never knew why. My mother and Tom separated around Dec of '05. Tom told me that I was more than welcome to stay and live with him. I didn't feel right so I left with my mother. We moved in with my grandparents. Not long after living with my grandparents, they informed me that my mother was doing drugs. Her use of narcotics was pretty much taking over her whole life:( I finally knew what was going on and why everything was the way it was. My mother wasn't really around. So it was just my grandparents and I. I was lucky enough to have a best friend that I've known since I was about 3yrs old that lived 2 houses from my grandparents. While living at my grandparents, I started dating a boy named Nick. He was my first bf, first love, first everything. Being around my friends helped me not think about all that was going on. My brothers and sisters were allowed to come over to my grandparents. I was very thankful for that! My mother met a man named Mark and decided to move in with him. I was invited to move with her and I did. I didn't want to make my mom feel as if I didn't care for her so I wanted to stay with her. We live with Mark for awhile. My brothers and sisters got to come there as well. My mother wasn't doing to bad, so it seemed. Until one day Mark kicked us out cause my mom was gone for a couple days doing drugs most likely. So I got to pack my things again and move back to my grandparents. By this time I wasn't even going to school much, cause it was all just to much for me. So again I'm back at my grandparents and my mother is just getting worse. My mother was working at the time so she was making money. She got an apartment and I moved with her again. We didn't stay long because she was spending all her money on drugs. So again back to my grandparents house. Then Nick and I break up so I feel all sorts of alone. I'm only 15 at this point!

I decided that I wanted to go back to school so in August '99 I go back. I turn 16 in September and I'm in school doing well. My whole life I always did good in school. I always got A's and B's. It was just to much to deal with that I decided to drop out. I'm still living with my grandparents and my mother was never around. She was always out doing drugs. I wasn't seeing my brothers and sister to often cause Tom had started seeing a woman named Laurie and they just stopped coming around as often. I started seeing a guy named Danny who was 20. After about 6 months of dating, I became pregnant. Danny and I get an apartment together. My mom was around off and on. She met a man named Chris and married him in Nov '00. I gave birth to my son in Dec '00. A few days before my son was born Danny and I got engaged. I'm now 17 have a child and engaged. Things seemed to be well. In about June of '01 I found out I was pregnant again. I give birth to my daughter in Feb of '02. My mother wasn't there for the birth of my daughter because her addiction had taken over her life. That made me feel horrible. A few days later she comes around.

I was always so worried about my mother because I knew the things that had happened to her while she was out using. She had been robbeb, car jacked, beaten, arrested. One night I get a phone call from the police saying they found my mom unconscious in a ditch. My mom had no clue what had happened and how she ended up in a ditch. I started to think that she would never get better. She tried rehab and it didn't help her.

About a week before I gave birth to my son in Dec of '00 my grandmother(my moms mom) passed away. She had been sick for awhile, but it was still devastating. My mom was so messed up on drugs that nothing seemed to phase her. At this point in time, I could care less if I never talked to her again.

My mom and her husband were both doing drugs. So now I have someone who is enabling my mom to do drugs. What's it going to take for her to stop using?!

When you have a drug ADDICTION it takes over your whole life and affects everyone around you!!

THIS IS FROM THE TIME I WAS BORN UNTIL I WAS ABOUT 18YRS OLD. So there's still lots more for me to share.